Divorce may be a common
choice but the journey is unique to every woman. When a woman is walking
her journey through divorce, there can be days when she feels like she’s
walking through a fog so thick, she can't tell up from down or left from right.
When we are
uncertain about which direction to move, we often find ourselves clinging to
the past because it’s what we know. Familiar
surroundings, people, places and events are something we try to cling to during
divorce because staying with what we know seems less fearful than journeying
into the unknown. Divorce is an ending that creates a new beginning and
with every new beginning; we must let go of the past to make room for what is
to come.
Letting go is an important
part of the divorce process but the length of time it takes you to let go of
feelings, emotions, drama, grief, loss, uncertainty and who you believed you
were before your divorce is a choice only you can make.
When we are faced with an obstacle or challenge in our life, these
3 questions can help us determine our next step:
#1: What Belief/Feeling can
I let go of at this very minute?
#2: What Belief/Feeling
will I let go of at this very minute?
#3: What Belief/Feeling do
I need to hold onto for a while longer?
Everything we experience in
our life is meant to teach us something.
When you believe things happen "TO" you rather than
"FOR" you, you live your life in Victim Mode. When you learn how to let go of victim mode
you then create a new belief around the possibility of living every moment in
our life in a way that matters most to you.
Although this is a journey
no other person can walk for you, there will be many people who will have their
own thoughts, opinions and beliefs about what you should or shouldn’t do during
your 3 Stages of Divorce.
The 3 Stages of Divorce are:
1.
Thinking About It
2.
Going Through It
3.
Putting It Behind You
The
journey through divorce is often a lonely path and along the way people will
always have an opinion or “well-meaning advice” that is of little or no help
because they often don’t realize they are advising you based on how they need
you to show up in their life.
You
have a right to go through this journey in a way that empowers you, you don’t
owe your time or explanations to anyone. People come into our lives because they have
something to share or teach us. When the
lesson is over, some people will drift out of our lives. When you give yourself permission to let go
of the person you have shared your life with up to this point, and make room
for the people, places and events that your new beginning is creating for you,
you begin to experience the power you possess on your journey through divorce.
This
journey is unique to you, you have a choice to look for the negative
or look for the positive; choose the one that gives you the opportunity to grow
to your full potential!
Nancy
Mueller ~ Mastering Your Beliefs Sensei
